Well Buddha is back in the muthaf*@kin’ house and New York couldn’t be more pleased. Because he left after assaulting Tailor Made all the contestants were forced to sign waivers granting him active status once again. Tailor Made looked angry and scared when Buddha came strutting back in the game, yet he signed the waiver as a show of support for the object of his obsession, Miss New York.
The guys’ challenge was to cook a boobylicious dish for the lady, and the Entertainer immediately phoned his ma who told him to add two “jiggers” of vodka to his penne a la vodka sauce. What is a jigger? I honestly have no idea if it’s a shot or a cup or a fifth. Mr. Boston was the special guest who, like the Iron Chef chairman, dramatically revealed the secret ingredient. It’s New York’s favorite food, ranch dressing! YAYYY! All the guys were instructed to use at least a CUP of ranch in their recipes. Some worked (Wolf’s fajitas, the Entertainer’s penne), while others comically fell flat by combining ranch with caviar, salmon and mango or using it to destroy a perfectly good cheesecake. Buddha and Wolf won and were sent on one-on-one dates with Tiff, and Buddha’s went so well I expected them to strip down and lube up so NY could inspect this package he kept bragging about. They have such undeniable sexual chemistry. I hope she’s on the pill because that man looks more potent than Kevin Federline.
Wolf got to escort NY to her guest starring role on FX’s Nip/Tuck, and while she was killing them softly with her attitude and timing he was killing her with his gassy ass. Wolf cold cut a fart during their nap and disgusted the sleeping maiden and effectively destroyed his chances in the game. After seeing Flavor Flav eat you’d think NY got off on gastrenterologically challenged suitors, but instead this fearless juggernaut has rules, boundaries and restrictions for her boyfriends’ fart parts. God bless you Wolf. The show went great for NY, the producers loved her and Julian McMahon kissed her on the mouth. He’s so sexy!
Sensing elimination around the corner Tailor Made ordered an $850 La Perla negligee for Tiff and delivered it to her to put her in a good mood before she put one of the bulls out to pasture. New York passed out chains in order of effort, and Tailor got the first one after spending so much dough on his ladybird. Buddha was in a close second and I think New York put him down a peg so he works even harder to woo her and win her in the end. I can’t see her picking anyone else on this show, and I know she’d like to rub a lot more than Buddha’s belly.
