Fancast: Inside TV

I enjoy how Vincent calls Piers, “Pierce.” In the Hydra war room, there was a little war of words between Vincent and Piers, but it was just tension getting to them. Stephen Baldwin was the peacemaker and had Piers back off a little. I like Stephen, especially since he always comes dressed for the part. Every week he’s in a nice suit and what looks to be an American Flag pin on his lapel. With that look, he’s ready to anchor on Fox News. Stephen is cool and I have a strange feeling he may wind up winning the whole shebang. I know I’ve goofed on him in the past, but we tease those we like.

Vincent was happy with this week’s challenge when he stated, “This is a good one since we’re all in show business.” As long as he thinks so, it’s fine by me. I don’t want to get whacked.

As usual, the celebs needed to call every rich person they know to buy show tickets. Nely Galan, who has gotten completely on my nerves, said that “She has a better black book than Gene Simmons.” I think she’s talking about a different black book, unless her book contains the numbers of groupies from around the globe. She said her black book is better than Mr. Simmons’ book because her book contains all “C’hlahtinohs.” That’s phonetic for the way she pronounces “Latinos.” She speaks perfect English, but when she says “Latinos” she needs to throw the accent on there as if she’s on Telemundo and not NBC.

In the Hydra war room, Stephen didn’t want to use any celeb contacts to sell tickets. Maybe that’s because he used the only one he has last week when brother Alec showed up. He and Piers exchanged some words over this and the testosterone was flying so much that I needed a protein shake just to keep pace.

Piers took out his cell phone and rang up Virgin Airlines honcho Richard Branson. Sir Richard informed Piers that two stewardesses would be arriving with a 10k check for theater tickets. Every time one of the celebs calls a rich friend, it’s a free commercial for their company. The 10k that Richard gave has to be about 100k less than what it costs to run a commercial on the show.

Trace Adkins reminded us that he doesn’t know many wealthy people, but he met a woman from EMI records a few weeks back and she showed up with a few thou for the cause. Nely called some real estate people from Cushman Wakefield and they also kicked in a few thou. Two times on the show Nely had to remind us that she’s a “star.” She actually said that, “I’m a star.” I can’t confirm or deny this, but her face looks like a porcelain doll.

The teams each had a booth in the heart of the theater district where they had two hours to make as much money possible.

Empresario, sadly as usual, didn’t utilize any of their team properly. Carol Alt, who is still a Super Model, was behind the cash register and not standing on the street using her god given charms. Marilu called her friend David Hyde Pierce, who’s starring in “Curtains”, and was the shill they used in attempt to attract buyers. However, he was in a baseball cap, looked incredibly uncomfortable and no one seemed to recognize him. When Vince stopped the ladies’ booth, he asked why David wasn't on a pedestal where the people might actually see him. No answer.

It’s not looking too good for Empresario.

Over at the Hydra booth, it was all action. Vincent got a megaphone for Stephen to announce to the crowd, “We have celebrities here selling theater tickets!” It worked. Then Vincent had a great idea, he got a Knight costume and had Piers put it on like he was King Arthur in Camelot. Again, it worked. See, the guys have no problem using themselves for marketing. Why can’t Empresario figure this simple obvious logic out?

In a quick interview piece, Vincent said he used his project manager skills as they do in the mafia. “In my world, you have a boss, and his soldiers.” Vinnie is like a Don in training. Maybe he really is connected.

On the street Trace approached some foreigners who didn’t speak a word of English and magically they seemed to carry on a conversation.

As the clock neared the deadline, Piers was freaking that the check from Virgin hadn’t arrived. A rep from the company said the stewardesses were nearby and they’d make it there in time. With minutes to spare, two stewardesses showed up with the 10k check for Virgin’s incredibly inexpensive plug.

In her private interview segment, Omarosa stated that softball Olympian Jennie Finch wasn’t a “leader.” Ahem, Jennie has a gold medal and you just have gold fillings. What kind of a leader is Omarosa anyway? Leader of the annoying?

In the boardroom Vince said the women weren’t using their skills to sell. I think he was referring to a little T & A.

Nely Galan’s voice is even raspier than the late Suzanne Pleshette. Can she please clear her throat? It’s not sexy at all.

In the boardroom the ladies were quite confident that they had finally won. After all, they’ve lost the first three weeks to Hydra. The men didn’t seem as confident and I was beginning to think that they had finally lost. When Vince announced the tally for Empresario, $31, 757, it seemed they had it locked. But why the odd number? Did someone donate seven dollars?

Then the ravishing Ivanka announced Hydra’s numbers. $33, 300. Boom. As Vincent would say. Oh, I almost forgot the most important thing in the boardroom, Ivanka was wearing a black number and looked fantastic. So, Team Hydra are the winners yet again. Donald is frustrated that the women are slacking. He asked Marilu why can’t they keep up? She said, “They have more star power.”

Wow, is Stephen thrilled to hear that. Nely defended their team and said that several thousand dollars showed up a scant few minutes after time had expired. But Donald wasn’t interested. He doesn’t like excuses. He likes winners. So who would team leader Marilu bring back to the boardroom to be fired? Once again it seemed like the choice should be Nely. It was her contacts that failed to show up in the allotted time with the cash that would have put them over the top. Omarosa did nothing for this week’s challenge. To me, she should be gone. When Donald went around the room asking who she should be gone, Carol said Omarosa. Of course, Omarosa made her usual disgruntled face and said that Carol wasn’t “a leader.” She is a leader, give her chance. You’re not a leader Omarosa, you’re a loud mouth.

When Donald gave the prize to Hydra, he asked Vincent Pastore what his charity was. Vincent said that his daughter’s stepfather, whom he described as “a great Jewish guy” who died from pancreatic cancer, would receive the donation for that deadly killer in his name. Kudos. I liked how he threw in “a great Jewish guy” when he mentioned the departed’s name. There was no reason for it, but that’s what I relish about this show, everyone speaks in their own tongue.

Colorful guys like Vinny remind me of everyone I grew up around. The people who have to state someone’s religion, ethnicity, or eating habits when they describe them. "Italian Tommy." "That black guy Anthony." "The Chinese guy at the movie theater." "Jimmy who never chews his food." That's the way real people talk.

Marilu chose two people that she feels the team could live without. Jennie and Carol.
In the firing room it didn’t take too long for Donald to can Jennie Finch. She did herself in the minute she spoke and said she can’t compete in this world. Boom. You’re done. Carol didn’t even have to defend herself. Trump axed Jennie but quick. “I’m a big fan of yours, and you’re right, this isn’t your world, so you’re fired!”

This show moves so fast that the hour goes by before you know it.

In the limo ride to the airport, Jennie said it was interesting to see the difference between the Apprentice world and the Softball field, no kidding girl! No oil up that glove and win us another gold medal.

Apprentice is done so well. They pack plenty into one hour and before you know it, you’re fired!