Fancast: Inside TV

One of the male dancers, “Qis” (pronounced, ahh, Qis) suffers from over-workout. You know the look, the one where it appears he’s holding imaginary luggage.

In their first number of singing and dancing, the guys performed the classic Sam and Dave song, “Hold On I’m Coming”, but it was quite obvious that hitting the same original notes would be hard, so the key of the song had to be altered to something quite awkward. They danced OK, but if this doesn’t work out for them, Chippendales will be holding auditions next week.

There was a very sweet story about contestant Chris and his mom who was diagnosed with MS. She had to give up the piano but Chris has kept up his playing with his mom as his inspiration. I like those kind of stories, they’re real. Carrie Ann said that Chris stood out amongst the crowd talent wise. In Zak’s personal story piece he told us that he’s studying to be a dentist, but he really wants to be a performer. Dude, one of my best friends is a dentist, he’s rich. Figure it out.

The wardrobe for the guys is definitely done on the cheap. It looks like it all comes from the discount store, Ross dress for less. At the half hour mark Carrie Ann and Bruno have to choose their teams amongst the guys. Drew informed us that they would be chosen, “school yard style”, whatever that means. I went to school in Brooklyn, but I don’t think they’d be using the same system we did. Which was the fat kid gets chosen last. Bruno and Carrie Ann both want Zak on their team. As a matter of fact, Bruno boldly and loudly stated, “Zak is mine!” No comment.

The first choice went to Carrie Ann in a rather uneventful way. Drew had two envelopes and our hosts each picked one. Inside the envelopes it said, “1st” and “2nd”, indicating who gets first dibs with the pick, is that school yard style? Unless you grew up in a school yard that specialized in grooming future Academy Award presenters, this method was boring. I’d much rather have seen a coin flip or rocks/paper/scissors.
Carrie Ann chose Bradley, and Bruno chose, in his own words, “My leading man is…Zzzzaaakkk!” He really likes Zak. Again, no comment.

Here’s how the voting happens, the seven guys perform in groups and two each are chosen for both sides. The remaining three have to perform again together, two more will be chosen and one will go home.

OK, time for the girls first dance. The seven ladies performed Donna Summer’s “Bad Girls” and I thought they were all quite mediocre. Off key, clumsy dancing and bad outfits. Carrie Ann was right on target when she commented on the first group of the ladies singing as being “flat.” Yes, flat like a tire.

The next group of three girls were introduced by Drew singing what he called, “Lady Marmalahd.” It’s “Lady Marmalade” bro. Wasn’t he in a boy band? He lost any credibility for me with that slip up and I have to vote him off the show as the host. When Bruno picks the girls for his team, it’s as if his pointing his finger like an insane magician. He does it with such enthusiasm I fully expect to see lightening bolts fly from his finger tips. And if they want to jazz up the show, add those graphics.

The final three contestants of the girls and guys who weren’t chosen, perform together. However they don’t do any dancing, they just do bad harmonies and the guys do lots of jacket lapel lifting.
The final three girls performed, Charity, Corina and Alyssa performing “Survivor”, they are all horrible and not one of them should be allowed to survive.

Side thoughts, Phillip has a softball for an Adam’s apple. Bruno said when he chose the final two for his team that this was “The hardest decision of my life.” He must have had quite an easy life. I can only wonder what the second hardest decision he ever had to make was.

Going home was Max and Corina. I was surprised to see Corina leave, considering her mother owns a dance studio and she grew up dancing. Plus, she was the cutest of the lot. Dance Snores is over for the night. Now I can catch some z’s.