Fancast: Inside TV

Eight weeks ago in Los Angeles, 10 people gathered for an adventure. They never asked what was in it for them. They tried to show what one person could do to make a difference, says the Big Give's executive producer and host, Oprah Winfrey. Big dreams came true, lives were changed, and on tonight's finale just three remain: Cameron, a dot.com millionaire at 18, a fast-thinker who knows how to raise big money; Brandy, a beauty queen who touches as many lives as possible; and Steven, a father of three who thinks big and tries to pull off a spectacular. They have no idea one of them wins $1 million at the end of the night. Oh, and they get to meet Jennifer Aniston.

Oprah starts them off at Chicago's Union Station, which she calls the crossroads of America, and says the city outside is teeming with stories. TEEM-ING, she says. Neither the train station nor the city teeming with stories has anything to do with the next hour of TV. Steven, Brandy and Cameron have two and a half days to work together as a team to change lives. They actually sprint outside the station as if real drama awaits. It doesn't. Steven wants to raise money for the Chicago Hope Academy, a prep school for the under-privileged. Cameron gets the Blue Man Group to perform AND donate $100,000, but he's not keen on the event. Itching to go it alone, Brandy sets up a cooking class at the local Shriner's Hospital.

Bored yet? For the next 50 minutes, this threesome shows they can't work together, but their big hearts and generous souls won't allow them fight with enough intensity to make the show interesting. As finales go, this one is terribly, disappointingly flat. Shame Oprah. Extreme Makeover: Home Edition does this stuff every week and delivers a three-tissue cry-a-thon at the end. Oprah usually does it better in the afternoon.

The best the Big O could muster was Jennifer Aniston strolling out all in black with hair that did not have the best highlight work to help her give $30,000 to each of the contestants that had been kicked off in previous weeks. Then the three remaining big givers were presented envelopes by Oprah's elg of good taste, Nate Berkus. Steven's had $1 million in it. He was the winner! “Cameron and Brandy made it tough,” says judge Jamie Oliver. “Well done." And Steven gushed, “It’s such an incredible privilege to be part of the show.”

By Scott Patrick Wagner
Fancast.com

[watch series creator Greg Berlanti talk about writing Brothers & Sisters]

In this first original episode of Brothers & Sisters since the writers srike, this one titled "Separation Anxiety," we open on various Walkers watching election results, which show Rob Lowe losing the nomination. Also, Nora (Sally Field) is evidently sleeping with Isaac (the network must think it’s an issue that he’s black, since they avoid showing them kiss in two different scenes). The show then cuts to three months later (roughly the length of a Hollywood writers' strike), and we learn Kitty and Robert’s life-altering decision: she is now harvesting eggs (with Rob Lowe) for a prospective little Republican. Sarah is having big business and monkey business with the cute guy from Wings, and Nora has been living with (but apparently still not kissing) Isaac.

For half-sister Rebecca's birthday, preparations for a Walker train-wreck party are in fully swing. Slutty Holly and her old boyfriend (the blonde one and the dark one from thirtysomething) are now an item. In Nora news, she has accepted Isaac’s invitation to move to Washington, D.C., thus shocking her family. Everybody confronts her, causing the scheduled train wreck at poor Rebecca's party. Nora develops her first backbone of the season and tells them all to suck it, then Kitty — feeling hormonal from the Lowe-spawn harvesting — tearfully asks her not to go. Justin hears the thirtysomethings bickering about Rebecca's paternity: it might be Dark Thirtysomething instead of Nora's dead husband.

Then Rob Lowe gets a sudden phone call from the guy who beat him for the nomination, possibly courting him for Vice President. Sarah asks Uncle Sol to nix the business deal with Wings guy, so she can keep dating him without it being weird (too late). And Nora actually manages to kiss Isaac one time, this one on-camera, before she kisses him off altogether, spending the last shot of the episode poignantly eating all alone in her big house. There's gonna be guilt to spread for this.

By Jennifer Smith
Fancast.com

Titled "The Bat Jar Conjecture," this episode of The Big Bang Theory begins with Leonard noticing that the annual Physics Bowl is coming up, so he and Sheldon decide to participate. They argue about their team name. Sheldon wants Army Ant, Raj wants Bengel Tiger. Naturally, Sheldon wins. The trend of Sheldon’s annoyance becomes more prominent during their Physics Bowl practice round, featuring the hottest physics host ever, Penny. Sheldon keeps answering all the questions, even when he doesn’t ring in. Sheldon also takes it upon himself to design the team uniforms: three “support-red shirts,” and one “command-gold shirt.” (See also- Star Trek: The Original Series)

Leonard tells Sheldon he’s off the team. They set out to find a 4th teammate. Enter Leslie, whom we haven’t seen since she had coitus with Leonard. In her hatred for Sheldon, she agrees to be on the team. Meanwhile, Sheldon forms his own team.

On the day of the bowl, we meet Sheldon’s team. It comprises Sheldon, the janitor, the lunch lady, and (because of his poor Spanish) either the lunch lady’s son or her butcher. With Penny falling asleep in the audience, it comes down to one question for the win. It’s an impossible formula and only the janitor rings in… with the right answer! They can never turn the toilet paper roll the right way, but they know physics? Turns out, in his native Soviet Union, he was a Physics professor. Sheldon refuses to accept his answer in his pride, and PMS wins! Howard, a little too excited, rips off his t-shirt and totally creeps out everyone.

The show wraps with Penny showing off her pop culture knowledge and the revelation that Tweety Bird thought he saw a Romulan.

[watch the latest and past episodes of The Big Bang Theory]

By Jennifer Smith
Fancast.com

We all remember the infamous Robin Sparkles episode. This episode, titled "Sandcastles in the Sand," was that good - times a thousand! We begin with Ted pointing out Robin’s prominent breasts, to which she replies that she’s meeting up with an old boyfriend from Canada and wants to look hot. We flash back to a 16-year-old Robin and Simon, played by James Van Der Beek, (insert Dawson joke here) who is breaking up with her.

Back to present day, Simon shows up and totally looks like the guy who lived three trailers down from me. Robin giggles like he’s on the front cover of Tiger Beat magazine. Ted and Marshall decide she’s suffering from “revertigo,” a term used to describe someone who acts like a completely different person once a friend from the past shows up. Simon reveals that he met Robin on the set of her second music video as teen pop sensation Robin Sparkles. Barney freaks and makes it his mission to track down the video.

Simon invites Robin to see his band play a show. Afterward, in his hysterically strong Canadian accent, he dumps her again. Robin is stunned. Barney finds her crying and he sweetly comforts her so she invites him back to her place.

He asks if he should “just stick it in.” Don’t freak, he meant the video. Finally! The song is called Sandcastles in the Sand. It’s beautifully cheesy, with lyrics such as “I’m ready. Let’s do it,” and “I’m on the pill now.” Future Ted tells us Barney and Robin watched that video over and over again… until finally they weren’t watching any more. Cut to Robin and Barney kissing. Wait, what?! THIS, ladies and gents, is what you call a cliffhanger.

[Watch full episodes of HIMYM on Fancast.]

By Dianne Brooks
Fancast.com

As the “kids” - and I emphasize the quotes here since they hardly seem so - return from break (aka writer’s strike - nice!) in this greatly anticipated Gossip Girl episode titled "The Blair Bitch Project," [watch clips] Blair (Leighton Meister) recently dethroned from queen bee-dom literally gets belted with some fruity, yoghurty thing. Fortunately, now that Serena (Blake Lively) is back as her BFF, she has a shoulder to cry on. And Serena needs a BFF because since her mom Lily (Kelly Rutherford) is about to marry sneaky Chuck’s (Ed Westwick) dad Bart (Robert John Burke) there’s all this planning like a special dinner that includes a wedding cake tasting...foie gras cake anyone?

Seems as if someone that Serena assumes to be Chuck is playing dirty tricks by sending boxes with unpleasant surprises including handcuffs, naughty underwear and cocaine. In the meantime, Jenny (Taylor Momsen) is digging herself further in debt trying to finance her ascendence as Blair’s replacement. This has already involved pawning a sewing machine (that can’t really be worth much, let’s face it.) When formerly Blair’s now Jenny’s nasty entourage threatens a birthday night out at Butter, Jenny tricks Blair into showing up with the $100 tip required to secure a table for 8 without a reservation (right!) Still under pressure, Jenny swipes a $15,000 red Valentino gown from one of her new friends’ moms’ closet which was BTW about as big as my living room. It all implodes when Jenny, who has sold said dress to one of those second hand places Jackie O first made famous is forced to steal it back by wearing it out of the store and right into her “surprise” party hosted by, who else, Blair!

But when Jenny drags Nate (Chace Crawford) to Butter and literally takes Blair’s seat, all is seemingly forgiven. How many times can you plug a restaurant in one episode? Serena finally realizes that Chuck isn’t as bad as he looks...it’s “G” who has been sending her the packages in anticipation of her imminent return. Next week’s teaser reveals G as Georgina and she’s got a secret she’s holding over Serena’s head.

[See Fancast's Gossip Girl photo gallery.]

By Scott Patrick Wagner
Fancast.com

"The Court Supreme," tonight's episode of Boston Legal, proves one thing conclusively: James Spader is the BOMB! But I'll get to that in a minute. Things open with Jerry, the spitting-sputtering-hopping lawyer with Asperger's Syndrome, as he spitter-sputters out that he has "lost his cherry" to his unbelievably beautiful new girlfriend. Equally beautiful Lorraine meets the girlfriend, and the glances between them indicate that something is up. Knowing Boston Legal, it could be hot girl-on-girl action, but the secret is actually that the girlfriend is a prostitute. Oops. Meanwhile, Alan (James Spader, aka the BOMB) is enlisted to represent a man with an I.Q. of 70 who is about to be put to death for the rape of a little girl. The case is having a final appeal before the — gulp! — Supreme Court. Alan is briefed by the Mooters (professional moot court types) that he must be extremely well-behaved before the Supremes or they'll shut him down and the mentally deficient guy — who we're pretty sure is innocent — will fry like a breaded catfish. Denny begs Alan to let tag along to the Supreme Court, and against his better inclinations Alan agrees.

Lorraine tells Jerry that his girlfriend is a hooker, and Jerry looks ready to do some serious sputtering. When the hooker comes in to take Jerry out to lunch, he makes her admit her hookerness. Even though she earnestly explains that she really, honestly loves him, Jerry orders her to get her hooker heinie out of his life. Jeez, Jerry, get a grip! Nobody was paying her to be with you. She was giving you pro bono (insert your own joke).

Alan and Denny are now before the Supreme Court, nervous. During the opposing arguments, Denny toots. Yes, I said toots. From the butt. Judge Ginsberg doesn't seem too pleased, and neither am I, thinking this isn't going to be a very interesting episode. But then Alan gets up to make his case. And he launches into the grandest diatribe we are likely to hear on TV this season. He not only fierily defends the accused, he accuses the Supreme Court of being partisan and skewed and lays into them. It is a speech overflowing with the outrage every sentient American has wanted to say to the Supreme Court for at least eight years, and it is thrilling! I got a phone call two-thirds of the way through the speech, and it was only then I realized I had barely been breathing for seven minutes. We won't know the verdict, what with the Supreme Court beating off to the tune of its own drum. However, the closing "bromance" scene between Denny and Alan featured a moment of such nuanced acting from Spader that his BOMBdom is clinched. I wasn't sure I needed to buy the DVD box of this season; this episode alone makes it an essential investment.

[Watch interviews with the cast.]

By Jennifer Smith
Fancast.com

American Idol is finally reaching out to a more sophisticated audience tonight, leaving many teenaged girls scratching their heads in confusion. It’s Broadway, baby! Andrew Lloyd Webber shows up in some fetching maroon velvet trousers to offer advice.

Syesha Mercado: "One Rock & Roll Too Many" from Starlight Express
Syesha shows off her amazing eyebrow acting this week by being “animated.” She begins her song by channeling her inner Jessica Rabbit on top of the grand piano. She’s got a good voice, but it’s all a little cheesy. Randy says she would make a good Broadway star. She says she’s OK with that (so the point of you being on this show is…?).

Jason Castro: "Memory" from Cats
Webber seems to think Jason made a brave choice. You think? Aside from the annoying arms-waving-back-and-forth from the mosh pit, it wasn’t too bad of a performance.*snicker* The judges reamed him. They all agreed the song was too big for him. He’s so over this show that he can’t even muster a look of worry.

Brooke White: "You Must Love Me" from the movie "Evita"
I was gearing up for another “deep” performance from Brooke this week. The music begins, she starts to sing—and then apparently loses her shiznit. She stopped and asked to start again! Wow, do the other contestants know this is allowed? Any correlation to Madonna makes me shudder, but this song was just awful. The judges agree. Paula especially flips a lid about Brooke stopping.

David Archuleta: "Think of Me" from Phantom of the Opera
My nickname for little David is Muppet, since he reminds me of the entire cast of the Muppet Babies. Muppet rearranged Think of Me into some kind of mid-nineties boy-band pop ballad. Nick Lachey wishes he thought of it first. The tiny fists in the front row were pumping, so I knew the judges would love it, too. Randy and Paula that it was da bomb, while Simon that it was forgettable and weak. Back to the nursery with the rest of the Muppets you go.

Carly Smithson: "Jesus Christ Superstar"
Carly channels her inner Judas this week, and Webber seems to think she’ll rock it out because of her tattoos. She looks like she had a lot of fun. Randy’s not surprised the singers with the big voices are doing better tonight. Um yeah, it’s Broadway, Randy. That’s kind of a requirement. I digress. Paula and Simon liked her too.

David Cook: "Music of the Night" from Phantom of the Opera
I was all a twitter when I heard that my favorite singer was singing my favorite song from my favorite musical. But I’m not biased… except to say that he rocked my socks off. The note(s) he hit at the end gave me the goose bumps. I’m glad I have TIVO. My rewind button was in full force after that song. To quote Randy, he gave another “hot molten hot lava bomb!” I don’t know what that means, but I totally agree.

Bottom three prediction: Syesha, Jason, Brooke

Sent packing prediction: Brooke. Go home and watch something Rated R.

[See Idol in photos.]

By Jen Smith
Fancast.com

We all know American Idol is one big popularity contest. Sometimes the right person wins (Kelly Clarkson) and sometimes the winners fade into oblivion (where is Taylor Hicks, anyway?). Tonight will surely be no different, as America loves to vote the wrong way.

The top 6 perform Phantom’s “All I Ask of You,” with Andrew Lloyd Webber playing the piano, pretending not to notice the poor attempts at harmony. Is Jason even singing?
The hot topic of the night is Brooke’s blunder, which, now that I think about it, probably got her some sympathy votes. Webber says Brooke is talented, but then makes fun of Jason by calling his song choice “curious.” I think I like this man now… even if he does remind me of that creepy uncle who makes you show him your trophy collection and asks if he can hold one.

The music video of the week is pimping a Ford Fusion by having the kids rock out to "Tainted Love." They all look like post-apocalyptic vampires in their leather and big hair, except for Muppet, who just threw on a flannel shirt and called himself ghetto. And now, for the results. Dim the lights.

Ryan brings out the two Davids first. Muppet talks about changing up the song’s arrangement, but I couldn’t hear what he was saying over his weird breathing. It sounded like he was a cancer patient who got onto American Idol thanks to the Make-a-Wish Foundation. However, they’re both safe. Syesha and Brooke are up next. They both ramble for a while, but eventually Brooke is sent back to the safety of the couches, while Syesha is forced to sit/stand on the weird stools for the bottom two. Carly and Jason are up next. Naturally, we all presume Jason’s doomed. But, wait! America votes for the ones without talent! I forgot. This means that Carly is in the bottom two, naturally.

Carly and Syesha both sing their songs. Syesha bores me again but Carly brings the house down. Contrarily, Carly is sent packing. She seems gracious enough. I wonder if she’ll get another record contract. Next week is Neil Diamond week. Oh joy of joys.

[See what Kelly Clarkson is up to now.]

By Dianne Brooks
Fancast.com

Finally, Grey's Anatomy is back with an original episode. The opening voiceover has Meredith (Ellen Pompeo) musing as she sits stiffly before her shrink (Amy Madigan - always a pleasure) who she refuses to actually talk to. Next we find the four residents Meredith, Christina (Sandra Oh), Izzie (Katherine Heigl) and Alex (Justin Chambers) skidding down the halls of Seattle Grace trying to rack up points to win a surgical contest cooked up by Dr. Bailey (Chandra Wilson) who doesn’t seem to do much in this episode besides hold on to her cute little boy. The medical crisis of the week soon appears in a car driven by some people who have been attacked by a bear. Just as they’re gingerly unloading the driver, we see some twisty red thing and someone yells “Intestines in the Hands!” Surgery follows as does the guilty musings of his brother who seems to have provoked the attack by patting a baby bear cub on the head when he should have known better. In between this Meredith sees Derek (Patrick Dempsey) with his new squeeze who we find out later he still hasn’t slept with. Clearly a placeholder, she does blurt out that she loves him within earshot of Meredith, who barely registers a cringe. Lexie (Chyler Leigh), Meredith’s ill treated half sister has somehow wound up on the island of misfit toys with George (T.R. Knight) and some not so cute roaches. By the end, Meredith has won the contest and a glittery pager by identifying an incurable brain tumor in the bear instigator, whose uncharacteristic behavior was the giveaway (married his rebound girl as well.) Izzie has ordered a bunch of expensive and unnecessary tests for Cheech Marin (not playing himself), and Mark Sloan (Eric Dane) confronts Derek in the elevator about not having enough man time. As always we end where we begin with Meredith’s voiceover summary and some inkling that maybe she’ll get her %&#$@! together and head back to McDreamy with a little help from that shrink.

[Behind the scenes video with Patrick Dempsey.]

By Sara Bibel
Fancast.com

Ugly Betty’s back with its first post-strike episode. Woo! Go Betty, it’s your birthday. No, really, it’s her birthday. Betty dreams that Henry surprises her with a ride in a horse drawn carriage. As they watch fireworks, she’s awakened by her alarm clock. Her family wishes her happy birthday. Justin gives her a bedazzled cell phone. She rushes out to get a head start on her trip to the Poconos with Henry. Hector is upset she leaves without his homemade cupcakes. When Betty knocks on Henry’s door, Charlie answers. Boo! Go away! Charlie says she’s in town for a seminar with a baby doctor. Betty nobly tells Henry he should go, too. They can celebrate her birthday in NY. Amanda suggests Betty take Henry to the Pemberly Inn. Betty is disappointed that Daniel doesn't remember her birthday. Betty manipulates Daniel into giving up his tickets to the concert in the park with fireworks. Tito shows up with a buzz cut. Guess we know what Freddy Rodriguez did during the strike. She tells him about her plans. Tito comments the only thing missing is a carriage ride.

Wilhelmina tells Daniel to ask his current love interest, her sister Renee, about Stony Brook. Christina is going stir crazy in Wilhelmina’s apartment, where she’s stuck until she concludes her service as Wili’s surrogate. Renee freaks out when Christina lights a candle. Renee tells Daniel she’s getting an apartment around the corner from him. Freaked, he asks about Stony Brook. Renee says it’s where she went to college. She’s angry he’s letting Wili get to him. Renee warns Wili to leave her and Daniel alone. Christina overhears them via a baby monitor. Renee gets Marc drunk on chocolate martinis. Marc blabs that Wili forced Christina to be her surrogate in exchange for money for Christina’s husband’s medical treatment. He reveals Bradford is the Baby Daddy. Once the Mead heir is born Wili will get a third of the family’s empire. Renee tells Wili she knows her secret – she was secretly recording Marc.

[Inside Ugly Betty video.]

By Jonathan Weichsel
Fancast.com

Lost officially returns with Kate looking hot at the beach. She smiles at Jack, and Jack smiles back. It’s a nice warm opening to what will be a dark, dark episode. We see Jack taking pills. Are these antibiotics, as he says, or is this the beginning of his later addiction? Bernard calls for help. A dead body! Ah, now the show is really starting. It’s a bald guy. Do we know him from a previous episode? He looks familiar. Daniel says it’s the Doctor. Remember him? He took care of Minkowski. Wonder how his throat got slit…

Now Sawyer, Locke, and Hurley are talking about something very, very important. Ha! It’s a callback to Locke’s days playing RPG’s. Alex’s kidnappers force her to turn off the fence, but I guess she has time to send her father a distress code, because just then Ben’s phone rings and the voice at the other end tells Locke “Code 14 J.” Ben says it means “They’re here.” Ah, and now the flash forward. Ben wakes up in the Sahara desert, looking cold, dressed for the cold in stylish Dharma gear, and shivering. Ben uses his superior brains and agility to kick the butts of some Arabs who accost him… And now we’re back on the island where Ben is busy manipulating Locke.

Meanwhile, Jack is interrogating Daniel and Charlotte about the body. Back to the other’s camp. While Ben and Locke go nuts barricading themselves in, the new and improved heroic Sawyer is running about trying to save Claire and whoever he can. So far he doesn’t seem like a very effective hero, but let’s give him allowances. After all, he is new to the craft. Anyway, the people he warns to stay inside all get shot, and then a missile destroys the cabin where Claire is. And back to the flash forward. Henry is in Tunisia now. He looks a mess. He tells the concierge his name is D. Moriarty. If you remember, this is his alias from the episode “The Economist.” He asks the concierge the date, and indicates he is unsure of the year. Is Ben unstuck in time like Desmond? Or has he merely been in the desert to long? At any rate, for those of you trying to piece together the future chronology, the date is October 23, 2005. And then he sees Sayid on the television saying that he only wants to bury his wife in peace.

[Lost interviews.]

By Dianne Brooks
Fancast.com

Welcome back to the continuing saga at The Office. It’s Friday morning and Michael’s (Steve Carell) got gum in his hair which Dwight (Rainn Wilson) is more than happy to remove via a peanut butter head massage. (who knew?) Hot shit Ryan drops by to let everyone know they’re working on the Dunder Mifflin website on Saturday. Michael advises the group not take it out on Ryan (B.J. Novak who is also a writer on the show) by making fun of his height or his half beard. Vociferous objections follow particularly since no one really understands why there needs to be a social networking feature on the site, which as it turns out, was infiltrated by sexual predators. Later Michael, grabbing Ryan in a bear hug of desperation, confesses “I need a girlfriend so bad.” Ryan’s response that the NYC club girls are hot inspires Michael to grab Dwight (singles only) for their “night out.” The rest of the staff’s night out occurs unexpectedly when Jim Halpert (John Krasinski) forgets to tell security not to lock the gates after he has “brilliantly” suggested that everyone work late Friday instead of coming in on Saturday. Meanwhile Dwight and Michael show up at a club where Ryan is talking to his “banking wizard” friend who Dwight thinks is a hobbitt. Michael astutely notes that the club is full of “babies” which turns out to be true when he refers to the “Back to the Future” tattoo he plans on getting and one of same babes has never heard of the movie. Back in Scranton, Jim scrambles because he can’t remember the name of the security guard, Hank, who he wakes up in the middle of the night to come to the rescue. As if it isn’t enough being trapped in the hallway because Pam (Jenna Fischer) has locked the office from the inside, Michael thoughtfully sends them a pic of Dwight making out with an “amazon” volleyball player, eliciting simultaneous groans. They are finally liberated thanks to the cleaning brigade but not before Toby (Paul Liberstein, also a writer) has literally climbed over the fence on his way to New Zealand. Michael and Dwight drag Ryan back to his miniscule studio (it’s still way bigger than anything I remember when I lived in NYC) where Ryan asks what to do about a “friend” with a drug problem. (Ryan has been running back and forth to the bathroom BTW). Michael signs off by telling the the camera that “it’s not the horniness but the loneliness.” The episode ends with Hank cursing before a now empty parking lot.

[Extra: See Angela on the set.]

By Jonathan Weichsel
Fancast.com

The latest Battlestar Galactica episode [see complete episodes here] opens with shots of statues. Someone is making a speech. It is Tyrol. He is delivering a eulogy for Cally, and it is beautiful considering how she died. After the eulogy Tyrol nearly confronts Tigh and Tory. Tigh shows up to interrogate Caprica Six. He acts normal around the people monitoring her. We learn from Caprica Six that Tigh has been visiting her every day, but no longer asks any questions. Tigh suddenly sees Caprica Six as his dead wife Ellen. She asks him what he wants, what he needs. Now Tigh and Tory are confronting Tyrol. It seems they told him that Tory committed suicide. This explains his sincere sounding eulogy. Tory tells Tyrol that cylons are perfect, and that he should live without guilt. It seems that Tory is beginning to like being a cylon a little too much. In a way she reminds me of the drunk-on-power Mitchell from the classic Star Trek episode “Where No Man Has Gone Before.” Anyway, Tigh is still acting like Tigh, but we can see he is having his doubts.

Tory are getting really into Baltar’s cult. She does something erotic to him. I won’t say what except to mention that it perfectly sets up the pain/pleasure theme that will be explored throughout the remainder of the episode. Then, there is a gas attack on the cult. And then a raid… but who are the raiders? They are looking for Baltar, who is hiding behind a rafter. We see Tyrol working. He has flashbacks of Cally. A raptor gets into a little accident, lands a little hot, and everyone onboard nearly dies. Cool special effects sequence. Back in Baltar’s cult, we learn that a fundamentalist group known as The Sons of Ares carried out the attack. We learn this because they spray painted their name on the walls. But who are The Son’s of Ares? No one seems to know. A member of Baltar’s cult, Lily, is still holding on to the old Gods. And Tyrol fesses up to accidentally causing the accident. He is loosing it. He wants to be disciplined, but nobody will discipline him.

By Emily Hochberg
Fancast.com

It’s the third new post strike episode on Wisteria Lane and our dearly departed narrator Mary Alice tells us tonight's Desperate Housewives is about breaking the rules. Lynette fears her husband Tom is responsible for a fire in Rick’s restaurant; Rick has a thing for Lynette. Tom did throw a brick through Rick’s window, and so in his loving wife’s mind, he must be guilty. Needless to say, Tom isn’t a fan of Rick, but denies any wrong doing. Meanwhile, Dylan is pulled over for speeding. Not just by any cop, but by guest star Gary Cole! He cites her and admires her necklace. First red flag. He let’s her go and retreats to admire a newspaper clipping of Dylan, her face circled in red pen. Second, literal, red flag. Across town Bree is packing to leave Susan’s where she and Orson were squatting. Susan’s pregnancy hormones are in overdrive and Bree offers some advice. When any unnecessary emotion comes on, pack it away in an empty metaphorical box and pack the box into an empty metaphorical closet. This explains a lot. Carlos is adjusting to life as a blind man and brings home Roxy, a Seeing Eye dog. While he hopes Roxy will make everyday life easier, Gabrielle hopes she’ll help fetch the remote and teach Carlos to pee like a girl. Instead, Roxy only wants Gabrielle’s place in bed.

By Scott Patrick Wagner
Fancast.com

In the latest episode of Brothers & Sisters, titled "Double Negative," Kitty and Rob Lowe strobe from discussing her harvested embryos to dealing with a Vice-Presidency offer from the Repub Prez candidate, Ken Howard (who looks much puffier than when he had that TV sitcom with Gwyneth Paltrow's mother). Ken Howard is also much more of a supreme butthole than he was on the White Shadow, which leads to later drama. Right now, however, all the siblings (including half-sister Rebecca, waiting on news of her paternity DNA test) converge on the homestead to make sure that Mama-Nora-cum-Gidget is doing okay now that she unceremoniously dumped Isaac. She is fine, except planning to redesign the rumpus room, or some such thing she historically does when life gives her lemons. Rebecca excuses herself, but not without a moment with Justin. They exchange such a cute fist-bump goodbye that it's clear that if they're not really related then some serious panty-dropping is on the horizon.

Maybe-not-half-sister Rebecca walks in on Slutty Holly canoodling with her previous and present boyfriend, Dark Guy from thirtysomething. Rebecca's phone rings as her slutty mother exits for work, leaving only Dark Thirtysomething to shoulder the tirade as Rebecca realizes he is her father. Unlike Darth Vader when revealing such information to Luke Skywalker, Dark Thirtysomething doesn't lop off her arm with a light saber, but instead sheepishly admits that he had been such a loser drug-addict that she was better off thinking she was a bastard and/or orphan than having him around. She's pissed, though, and there's gonna be heck to pay with Slutty Liar Holly.

By Jen Smith
Fancast.com

It’s Ted’s 30th birthday on this week's How I Met Your Mother… and Future Ted tells us that we finally get to hear the long-awaited story of “The Goat.” But first, it’s time to find out if there’s awkwardness between Barney and Robin after their hook-up last week. It’s the day after and they’re still in bed. Yup, it’s awkward. Robin wants to forget it ever happened, but Barney’s more interested in taking mental snap shots of her boobs. He agrees to them being buddies again and begins to brag to Robin that he nailed the chick from Metro News One last night. (High five.)

At the bar, Barney is acting nervous and confused. He thinks Lily wants a clown in the room as she and Marshall have sex with Robin. Don’t ask… long story. Ted found out about the surprise birthday party and reminds Barney to invite Stella (Sarah Chalke, who doesn’t appear tonight). Later, Barney calls Marshall and hires him as his lawyer. He wants Marshall to find a loophole in the “Bro Code,” which lists rules such as “bros cannot make eye contact during a Devil’s three-way.” For those of you not in the know, that means two dudes are present. Google it.

Meanwhile, Lily acquires a goat through a drunken farmer who is a little too open to her kindergarteners about the goat butchering process. She brings it back to the apartment. I sense impending doom. Marshall tells Barney there’s no loophole, so he needs to tell Ted the truth. It’s the day of Ted’s birthday and Barney tells Ted he has to confess something. Turns out, Ted already knows. Robin told him (in a flashback sequence) and he tells her he’s not mad at her. He is, however, mad at Barney. Ted’s mom is coming to town soon… Ted thinks maybe Barney would like to nail her, too. (If I remember, she’s a total MILF… ) Ted doesn’t think they should be friends anymore and leaves for the surprise party on the roof.

At the very end, we discover that the goat had locked itself in the bathroom and was eating one of Robin’s washcloths. But wait, Future Ted says, Robin wasn’t living there then. The Goat was actually his 31st birthday. Holy cow! That means Robin is living with Ted in a year! Did she lose her job? Is she back with Ted? I love a show with built-in spoilers.

[watch full episodes of HIMYM]

By Jeremy Monsayac
Fancast.com

The latest episode of Bones titled "The Baby in the Bough" opens with a woman’s car run off the side of a road. She is found burned to death, but her baby survives the accident without a scratch – in a tree. Brennan takes custody of the baby, to her chagrin. The victim is a tire plant worker living in a depressed area in West Virginia, where Booth and Brennan head to find answers. Angela learns that the key, which was swallowed by the baby at the crime scene and recovered as Booth changes his diaper, is to a safe deposit box at a bank in West Virginia where Booth and Brennan find a gun. Preliminary evidence leads the team at the Jeffersonian to think that an accountant from the plant’s corporate office – who was thought to be romantically interested in the victim and had been missing for the past four days – was a suspect. However, bone and tire fragments from the gun are matched to the accountant and the plant, proving that he too was a victim. Booth and Brennan pay a visit to the tire plant and indeed discover bone fragments in mulch belonging to the accountant. After making this discovery, Angela advises Booth and Brennan that there are accounting discrepancies that point to the manager. The gun, it turns out, was used by the tire plant manager to kill the accountant when the accountant threatened to turn the manager in for embezzling. The victim tried to blackmail the manager and kept the gun in the safe deposit box as proof, but the manager murdered her as well. After resolution of the case, Brennan has bittersweet feelings as she hands custody of the baby to his late mother’s friends. Her maternal instincts kicked in during the case and consequently she uses her six-figure advance to help the baby’s new family.

[watch the latest full episodes of Bones]

By Jeremy Monsayac
Fancast.com

In this installment of The Hills titled "A Date with the Past," Lauren, Audrina and Lo make it official and move into a new home in Hollywood, replete with a private guest house for Audrina. Lauren and Lo discuss who’s invited to their housewarming party and Lauren casually mentions Stephen Colletti (yeah, that Stephen) to Lo’s amazement. Poignant Moment #1: Lo asks Lauren how long she and Stephen liked each other in high school and beyond; Lauren pauses and says “I don’t know. I never really stopped.” Meanwhile, Stephanie runs into Spencer at a coffee shop. Stephanie tells him that she’s going to Lauren’s housewarming party and, after he questions her loyalty, he storms out, presumably to go back to her apartment or to another coffee shop (apparently, Spencer spends most of his free time alone in Stephanie’s apartment or in coffee shops, waiting to argue with someone). Stephanie decides to double her fun and also tells Heidi that she’s going to LC’s housewarming. Heidi questions her loyalty as well, which successfully shames Stephanie into skipping the party. At the party, Brody shows up with his new (and ample) girlfriend Cora, to Lauren’s chagrin. Justin Bobby strolls in as well, sporting a short new ‘do and talks to Audrina about the growing rift between her and the girls – specifically Lo – due to her seeing Justin Bobby again. Stephen shows up at the party and makes dinner plans with LC to catch up. At dinner, they reminisce over the past and laugh about being constantly pressured by friends and family to get together. Sadly, Stephen calls their relationship platonic and kills any immediate romantic notions that LC ostensibly had. Poignant Moment #2: after dinner, Lauren tells Lo “…some things are better left the way they are. Hanging out with him makes feel like I’m high school…but I’m not in high school anymore.”

[watch an interview with Heidi]

By Jen Smith
Fancast.com

After a Penny-light episode last week, I was hoping for a few more one-liners from her this week. I was not disappointed by the latest chapter of The Big Bang Theory, "The Nerdvana Annihilation." Leonard has discovered an online auction for prop from the movie The Time Machine. Turns out, it was a huge prop. It’s the full-size time machine and it’s taking up half the lobby. Oopsie. After a poor attempt from Howard to fix the elevator by pushing the up button, they’re forced to push it up the stairs. They’ve almost got it when Penny tries to leave for work, but there’s no room to get down the stairs. Sheldon suggests she go to the roof and jump to the next building to get out. Exasperated, she agrees. Mistake #1.

The guys get the time machine in the apartment and set up ground rules. No food, no shoes, and no nakedness on the time machine. (That means you, Howard). What transpires next is perhaps the largest laugh the show has ever received. In a nut shell… Leonard decides to travel to the future to get a cloaking device from Captain Kirk, and while he’s “traveling” Sheldon, Raj and Howard move around the apartment in fast-forward like they’re actually in the midst of a time travel. Brilliant. Penny interrupts their fun… and she’s mad. While jumping to the next building, she got a skinned knee, the door ending up being locked, and she had to be let in off the fire escape by an Armenian family who fed her lamb and tried to set up her with her son. (Did the writers steal my diary again?)

Later, Leonard is upset that Penny yelled at them about the fact that grown men don’t have things like time machines. Sheldon gives him a kinda-sorta pep talk, but Leonard is determined to get rid of all his collectables and nerdy things. After a short fantasy sequence where Leonard pretends he’s a super stud and gives Penny a swoon-worthy kiss (Johnny Galecki needs my phone number, asap), she apologizes. He begins to ask her out on a date when a mystery metro man strolls in and takes her away. Leonard instantly changes his mind about giving up his collection and calls dibs on the time machine.

Overall, great episode. A lot of one-liners, which is great in my book, but also we got a reminder how much Leonard really likes Penny. I like the consistency in his unrequited crush. It makes it seem more real. I heart nerds.

[watch full episodes of BBT]

By Scott Patrick Wagner
Fancast.com

The latest episode of Boston Legal, "Indecent Proposals," pits The Power Known as William Shatner up against another force of nature, brilliant guest star Christine Ebersole as a cattle rancher out to block the sale of cloned beef. As she is introduced into the offices of Crane, Poole, and Schmidt, she asks Denny Crane if he eats meat; he responds, "Your place or mine?" And the tone is set for another wildly entertaining hour. The second case on the docket involves Shirley asking Alan to help her sue the Democratic Party . . . it seems her insufferable nephew is a superdelegate in Hillary-chosen Massachusetts who has decided to throw his super-vote to Obama instead. The sheer timeliness of this episode boggles the mind, citing issues as fresh as the Clinton "mistruth" over that "under fire" arrival in Bosnia. (TV episodes usually have a pretty long lag time between filming and airing; this one, amazingly, must've still been in rewrites as of last week.)

In cattleville, Denny has determined that Sunny Fields (Ebersole) is "the one," and he is madly in love. "Mad" being the operative word, since Denny has spent the past four years trying to convince everyone he has Mad Cow disease and now seems to be proving it. On a visit to his hours-old beloved's ranch, Denny asks her how she can tell if any of the cows have That Disease. She explains that the cows reveal it themselves, by running away from an afflicted member of the herd. As Sunny brings Denny up to the gate to introduce him to her livestock, all the cows make an immediate stampede away from Denny. He is a shaken man, certain that the rest of his herd have confirmed his diagnosis.

By Sara Bibel
Fancast.com

The latest Ugly Betty was a sub par episode – heavy on plot, light on wit. It opens with Wili secretly hoping that getting rid of Renee’s medication will drive her crazy. Renee tells Daniel that Betty’s in love with him. Wili warns Renee that Daniel has a history of cheating on his girlfriends. A delusional Daniel dreams Betty’s trying to seduce him. Christina and Betty find Wili’s file on Renee. They learn that Renee’s professor died in a fire. Afterwards, Renee was institutionalized for 6 years. They're convinced Renee killed him – and will go after Daniel next.

Stunt casting alert! Project Runway’s Christian Siriano and Nina Garcia meet with the Mode team. Of course the words “fierce” and “hot tranny mess” are uttered. Yawn. Renee accuses Christian’s models of sleeping with Daniel. Daniel tells Renee’s doctor what happened. The doctor reveals Renee was actually trying to kill the professor’s assistant, who she perceived as her romantic rival. Renee corners Betty in a candle filled room in Daniel’s apartment. The curtains catch on fire. Betty tells her that Daniel’s in love with her. She has no reason to worry. When Daniel arrives, Betty has put out the fire. Renee is institutionalized. Wili is thrilled. Daniel mentions the crush he thinks Betty has on him. Betty, amused, assures him it isn't true.

Hilda’s nemesis, Gina, becomes her salon customer. A blinged out Gina brags about her new doctor husband. Hilda borrows clothes from the Mode closet. When Gina returns, Hilda’s dressed to the nines. Hilda realizes Gina’s shoes are fakes. Gina’s husband turns out to be a chiropractor. Betty learns Charlie’s staying in town until the baby’s born. Amanda tells Henry that Gio’s in love with Betty. Henry orders Gio to stay away from Betty. Gio takes this as fighting words and tells him to take the first punch. When Henry does, Gio’s shocked. An apologetic Henry admits he’s afraid he'll lose Betty. Gio tells Betty what Henry did. Henry apologizes to Betty for his behavior. As they kiss, Daniel watches with a hint of wistfulness. Hmmm…. Maybe Renee isn't so crazy after all.

By Dianne Brooks
Fancast.com

All in all, The Office has been terrific on every level since returning from the writers strike with original episodes, and last night's episode of The Office continued the streak of good writing, laughs, and outstanding performances. It opened with Michael running into the office giddy with excitement because there’s wet cement outside of the office. Next thing you know they’re all outside doing the Scranton version of Mann’s Chinese with who else but Michael putting his face into the sidewalk so that he can leave something for his grandkids and posterity. Dwight, seeing Andy and Angela being idiotic together schemes to make something bad happen. This consists of him using his awesome powers of persuasion. His method is to bend people to his will by putting his face close to theirs and then counting down until they cave. Kinda the way parents do when their toddler is doing something bad. Anyway it works on Andy who sells Dwight his Xterra which Dwight then flips on Ebay for a profit. Meanwhile, Pam forgot her contact solution when she slept over at a “friend’s” and walks around in her goofy glasses which Michael decides make her look like an ugly scientist. Later at a staff meeting Michael gets shamed by Stanley after Michael turns to him for some “urban” language input.

When Michael goes to Darryl for some advice on how to handle Stanley’s sassy, bold, black man aggression, Darryl shares what he has taken away from his extensive gang experience with the Crips, Bloods, Latin Kings etc. Seems they use a method called “fluffy fingers” to mediate conflicts. Toby the rat is concerned about Stanley’s surly behavior as well as Jim’s goofing around. Jim gets a formal job performance warning from Toby. Michael decides to fake fire Stanley in front of everybody. This backfires when Stanley threatens a lawsuit verbally piling it on Michael. Michael finally clears the office and has a heart to heart with Stanley who tells him he just doesn’t respect him. They come to an agreement and at the next staff meeting, Stanley does his part by sarcastically affirming Michael’s “Summer Christmas Sales Event” idea. But when Phyllis pipes up that it’s the stupidest thing she ever heard, Michael summons her for a private talk. Nice twist.

By Jonathan Weichsel
Fancast.com

The latest episode of Lost starts with Jack’s shut eyes. He opens them, and sees Juliet. She is fuzzy. He is dizzy. Bernard is arguing with Daniel and Charlotte over why there is no signal on the transceiver. Jack stumbles over and tries to calm everybody down. Bernard complains that the Daniel and Charlotte are lying. Jack says he know they are lying, and wants to wait for their people to come. He promises to get everybody off the island (a promise we know he will somehow break) and then collapses.

We flash forward to jack in bed. He looks bad. The phone rings. A secretary reminds him of an appointment, mentioning how bad he is with his calendar. He gets up. There is a pair of satin panties on the floor. He trips over what appears to be a model Star Trek ship, puts two wine glasses in the sink, makes coffee, and reads the sports page. Slowly, with a little clue here and a little clue there, we piece together what kind of night Jack is waking up from.

A woman is in Jack’s shower. Kate. She says she has bought him a razor. They share a very sexy kiss. Jack reads Alice in Wonderland to Aaron. From the way he is reading it, it sounds more like a story about Jack than one about Alice. Jack tells Kate his father used to read it to him. Kate: “I’m so glad you changed your mind. I’m so glad you’re here.” On the island, jack is really sick. Juliet puts him in the shade. He gets up and walks off. Kate is concerned.

By Alex A. Kecskes
Fancast.com

This season's 14th episode of Moonlight opens with a white-knuckle car chase through Beverly Hills as flashy celeb babe, Tierney, and bodyguard, Mick, (riding shotgun) evade paparazzi in black SUVs. Later, BuzzWire’s new chief tells Beth to get the scoop on the curse of Tierney's new movie from Mick. So Mick and Beth meet at a Hollywood bash…and almost kiss (don’t worry, it’ll happen and you can “repeat-TiVo” it to your heart’s content). Besides, you want Mick to miss that distant noise—and, regrettably, guilt— when he finds Tierney dead in the water? No way.

While following Scott, Mick runs into two Scooby-doo paparazzi vamps, then discovers Tierney was being blackmailed by some sleazoid paparazzo named Foster. That night, a nut case bounces Mick off his windshield. No biggie, right? Wrong. A lurking Foster “shoots” Mick walking away unscathed, emails the photos to Beth, and threatens to dig into Mick’s identity if she doesn’t tell all about Tierney.

Meanwhile, Logan’s research reveals Jason was broke and needed to bury Tierney’s new flick to collect insurance. But when Mick and Beth track him down, he pleads his cowardly excuse, saying investors would’ve smoked him unless he killed the movie—which Tierney kept alive, so he sent her to sleep with fishes.

Beth, wrestling with Foster’s threat, asks Mick how vamps deal with being exposed. “They move to another city,” explains Mick. In almost mob fashion, Beth asks Josef to “handle the situation,” realizing what will happen. Josef’s final caveat to Beth, “as a reporter, you’ll always be a danger to Mick.” At dinner, Beth tells Mick, “I quit BuzzWire.” Really? Cut to our Scooby-doo vamps, also at dinner, feasting on Foster. We fade out as ADA Ben shuffles through photos of Mick rebounding from the hit and run. A penny for his thoughts?

[watch Fancast's most recent episode]

By Jonathan Weichsel
Fancast.com

On this latest installment of Battlestar Galactica, it is day 58 of the Demetrius’ mission to find Earth, and Starbuck is in her cabin finger painting on the walls, oblivious to the tensions rising all around her. Helo tries to get her attention. He wants to talk about a rendezvous with the fleet. She wants him to look at charts. She says that she has lost the feeling. She says that she has lost the sound! I place an exclamation mark after ‘sound’ because this is the biggest piece of evidence we have seen that Starbuck is the final cylon. After all, she wasn’t on the Galactica when it went through the nebula and the other four were activated. And the only reason the four knew they were cylons is because they were the only ones who heard the music, and were all brought to the same place. So, it is possible that Starbuck was activated, or partially activated, without realizing it.

In Baltar’s cult, a woman shows him a picture of her family that died, and wants him to make sense of it. She speaks of the rage she feels. Baltar tells her he is sorry, and hugs her. He tells her that the Gods can not be blamed, because they don’t exist. Baltar is really becoming the religious leader! Many of his sermons, and some of the little adventures he has gotten into lately, are right out of Mathew. There is a question about Baltar I have been musing over recently: How sincere is he? Scenes such as the one just described, in which he eloquently lays out the one-God philosophy, and uses it to relieve suffering, would indicate that he is very sincere. But other scenes, such as one later in the episode involving Tyrol, in which he seems motivated by cynical political calculations, really put a damper on his sincerity.

[watch Fancast's most recent full episodes]

By Scott Patrick Wagner
Fancast.com

Tonight's episode of Brothers & Sisters, "Moral Hazard," was an arduous example of how 55 minutes of overwrought ponderousness could lead to 5 minutes of good stuff. If the difference between a buy-out and a merger sounds like fascinating drama to you, then you're welcome to the first 92% of the show; the rest of you sit tight till we get to the good stuff.

None of Kitty and Rob Lowe's embryos are viable, so they have to give her uterus a month off before they try again. But they're allowed to spend the month a-tryin' naturally, so they fornicate like bandidos. But she has to keep her legs up in the air afterward to "marinate." I won't make a joke about basters. Sarah and Uncle Sol and the Guy from Wings spend relentless amounts of time still being depressed about the 20 million smackeroos that Ojai Foods is now in debt. They have to tell Nora, whose face goes from Flying Nun to Places in the Heart in a nanosecond. Now everybody's depressed except Justin, who is hemming and hawing around Rebecca, his perceived sister. Because Little Justin clearly wants to find a landing strip in Rebeccaville,

By Emily Hochberg
Fancast.com

Sunday’s Desperate Housewives opens with newly separated couple Bree and Orson. There are some things Bree can forgive but attempted murder isn’t one of them and to her, jail time is the only penance. Can you imagine her children’s punishment for bratty behavior? Gabrielle and Carlos don’t seem to know Orson is looking for a place to crash and interview tenants to rent a room. The new roomie is Justine Bateman who plays Ellie, an art student, who pays in cash. That’s not shady at all.

As punishment for arson, Tom and Lynette discipline their twin boys with chores. Tom suggests therapy but Lynette wants to stick with housework. Maybe she should just send them over to Bree’s. Susan is off to Lamaze class alone the same week her ex-husband Carl comes with his brand new pregnant wife. The new wife doesn’t say much but Carl entertains as always, complimenting Susan on how fat she’s gotten. Dylan is still secretly meeting up with her long lost father Wayne behind her mother’s back. Her father picks her up to take her to dinner. Sounds normal, but I didn’t include that he called her “princess” while he did it. Didn’t they just meet?

[take this sexy look at Josh Holloway and Eva Longoria]

By Dianne Brooks
Fancast.com

Every day on Gossip Girl is a Blair-Little J face off even though Blair clearly has more money, more experience and a better wardrobe. Even though there’s no clear ethnic diversity in the main cast, they keep adding it to the supporting players. Remember last week’s SAT geek - judging from tonight's Gossip Girl episode, "About A Brother," it looks like she’s signed on as one of the “girlfriends” and guess what, surprise, surprise she’s Asian! But that's beside the point.

Seems like Little J has trumped Blair again with a party at boyfriend Asher’s Upper East Side digs. But wait! Isn’t that him kissing OMG...a dude? Right in front of brother Dan? Best line of the night: something about how it’s Dan’s duty to make sure his sister doesn’t become the next Katie Holmes. Second best when Lily pops one off about Eliot Spitzer. You know you’ve hit the skids when you’re CW fodder (and that’s absolutely no insult to CW.) 3rd best: GG’s got her balls back, she was totally turning into Page Six.